Loneliness and Lifelines.

Alright, today's topic is one that hits hard for a lot of people; loneliness. Loneliness sucks, and it can be a bigger issue than most people realize. We live in a world that seems so divided and cold, that we all need to have a place that we fit in. But what happens when we feel estranged or "second rate"? How do we cope with that feeling?

Starting off in a weird vein here -- ranking. We, as humans, rank people in order of importance. We don't always realize we do it, but we do. Which is why these people who say, "All of my friends are equally important to me" are lying. We've always done this. The people who we rank the highest are the ones we get the most benefit from. Back when we were a nomadic species, these "benefits" would be things like who could collect the most food, or who the better protectors were, or who would breed the best children. These were important to us because they ensured survival; not only for the individual, but for the bloodline.

These days, however, the benefits we use to "rank" people are a bit more complicated, and a lot more shallow. As a species, we've progressed   beyond the need to survive in the wild (for the most part). So our benefits have become things like who has the most money, or who is better in the sack, or who looks prettier. Deeper 'benefits' include who can love us the most, or who has similar interests, or who will always be available. Whether we like to admit it or not, we take the individual(s) who embody the most of these traits, and we "prioritize" them. There are usually two people who take home the gold; one of each gender. The one with the same gender typically becomes our "best friend" while the one with the opposite gender usually becomes out "significant other" (reverse these roles for homosexuals).

What happens, though, when you realize that you don't rank as anyone's #1? When you realize that no matter the circle, there's always someone more "prioritized" than you? It hurts, that's what. True loneliness runs deeper than just "Ohhh, I don't have anyone to hang out with tonight, I'm so lonely!". True loneliness is when you realize at any given time, you're at most a #2 person. When you realize that there's nowhere you really belong. If this feeling goes unchanged for a long enough period of time, it can lead to a depression deeper than any trauma could cause.

You begin to not only question other peoples' feelings for you, but your feelings for yourself as well. You lose all faith in yourself and in finding peace or happiness. You begin to resent other people who "have" someone. You want so badly to be loved, but at the same time, you want to be left alone for good. This feeling is one you can't change just by having a positive attitude -- it's neurologically ingrained in us to be hurt by this feeling.

So no matter who you are; love someone. Love everyone. Because you don't know if they've really got anyone else...you could be the line between life and death for them. And don't wait. Don't make excuses NOT to talk to someone who seems alone. If my "line" had waited just a few more weeks, I don't think I'd be here typing today. You can make more of a difference than you think. So go; get out there and make a difference in someone's life.